Seriously. I have figured out some serious shit today. In reading the book The Sweet Potato Queens’ Field Guide to Men: Every Man I Love Is Either Married, Gay, or Dead the author talks about “Man Ears”. To quickly sum up – Man Ears is what all men have that make it so that everything we say somehow becomes an invitation for sex. Example: “Let’s watch a movie” becomes “I want to watch nasty porn with you and have sex with you while watching it” Example: “Would you pass me the newspaper please?” becomes “I will give you a blow job” You get the idea.
So today, I get the following email from my brother Professor (of “Hi I’m Prof, wanna fuck?” famed pick up line – only continuing to prove the “Man Ears” theory): “When are you moving?? I saw Dad yesterday and he said he knew nothing about you moving until last Saturday when he was at Gma’s.” More