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Since yesterday was November 12th, I thought I’d take the time to discuss with you the ultimate date for those who follow Eventualizm - The 12th of Never. While the expression (and song based on said expression) states that this date lasts forever, there are several facts that dispute this as outlined below:
1. Never is not a month. As mentioned, November is a month, but Never is not. The closest you will get to The 12th of Never is to carelessly misspell November. This may have happened in the past, resulting in the creation of the expression - but that is mere speculation.
2. The only date that lasts forever is marriage. Unless you are getting a divorce, in which case the regret of that date lasts forever. The key here is that eventually you will get over both instances, but learn nothing in the process.
3. Anything sung by Donny Osmond will eventually get on your nerves. That’s not really a point connected these other examples, but it is a fact nonetheless.
Perhaps the only thing that holds true about The 12th of Never is that you’d wait for it to arrive forever, and it never will. But that is not an example of Eventualizm or a means to EffTD.
And it never will be.
Note: After posting last week’s article on The Lasting Supper, I received word that Canada Podcast Buffet had featured Effing The Dog: The Podcast on their show. Thanks, guys - I’m not surprised you have taste since you run a buffet!
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