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This EffTD Tool Of The Day isn't so much a tool as it is a "secondary GOOROO." The movie Free Willy was a breakthrough in cinema as far as I’m concerned. Once I was able to get around it’s somewhat erotic title, I was able to see it for what it truly was: a tale of how we all aim to be free. It was after that movie I began my extensive research on the species, which, of course was after I returned the movie to the video store.
After several hours of wandering around the library I gathered what I needed. As I left the library, alarms went off and young, hip, librarians (shattering yet another stereotype I’d envisioned) ran towards me. Naturally, I ran away, perhaps inspired by Willy’s own plight for freedom. After posting bail, I went home empty-handed. Turns out I mistook a bookstore for a library (easily done, I mean there were books everywhere!) and on top of that, my story didn’t help my case as it was Sunday when all libraries in my area are closed . Undaunted, I went home and hopped on my trusty source for all things that need be researched thoroughly and accurately: Wikipedia (citation needed). Here’s what I gleaned from that great “pedia of pedias.”
1. Dolphins like to party. They are very social and some even have Facebook accounts. The team at Flock seems to have known this also, as Flipper is interning there for the summer as a developer. 2. They will attack porpoises. And not by accident, either. They seem to do so deliberately. Dolphins and porpoises are also kind-of-like cousins. Watch your back, Xerxes. 3. They have sex for pleasure. All right. 4. Contrary to popular belief, most actually follow the Bills. Sorry, Miami - them’s the facts. What does this have to do with Effing The Dog? Two things. Firstly, you’ve just spent time learning about dolphins. A good few minutes. To some, that would be an act of Effing The dog on its own. Butm, you also have learned the dolphin is like your smarter brother in that they can get away with Effing The Dog far more often than you ever could. Why? Because that is all they do when they’re not rescuing people or at Sea World (and even those ones perform their water acts pretty much in a lackluster fashion). Only very few lifeguards can boast that. So if you’re one of those lifeguards, congratulations! You’re as smart as a dolphin. Secondly, it proves that dolphins kill some porpoise every now and again. And life is nothing without some porpoise being killed on occasion. There it is. The porpoise joke. You had to know it was coming.
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